3: Reflections on Marriage

Every time I talk to my dear old Dad on the phone he asks the same question:

 How is married life, is it everything you imagined?

My answer is always the same, YES!

Well, I don't yell. But it's always a yes, a good kind of yes, I never hesitate so I wonder why he asks every time still.

It's actually better than what I imagined, so much better. But I'm starting to wonder if our society has tainted marriage to the point that we assume them to fail as soon as they begin?

I hate that mindset so much. Seth and I know instinctively that divorce isn't an option, failure is not an option for us.  If divorce weren't so easy to achieve would that make people more willing to work out their problems? Maybe not so much work on their problems, but submit to the fact that they are prideful and imperfect and that they need help, humility...grace.

And by the way, I love being married. This is the best "choice" I have made in my young life and I have no shame in saying that. 

In these past 3 months of marriage I've learned that marriage has everything to do with grace and nothing to do with me. Marriage has everything to do with Jesus and His bride, the Church -- and how that beautiful relationship reflects on my own relationship with Seth.

I cling to that daily, because every day I fail. Everyday we fail. But every day we point each other to the one who can't fail.

If you can figure that part out, it's easier to navigate the ups and downs. Easier, not necessarily easy. Easier to remain humble, easier to serve, easier to submit (there I said it!), easier to love, easier to respect.

Admittedly, we haven't hit many big bumps yet. We don't have years of life experience under our belt. But we do have our good God who we know placed us together, provides for us, comforts us, and has more grace for us than we could ever provide for each other. So were running with that, were putting our eggs in that basket.

Right now my biggest advice to dating couples:
1.WAIT - and you know what I mean by that. Just...WAIT.
2.READ - read up on some good wisdom about how men communicate and receive love, it makes fights a lot easier when you understand how the other person is feeling.
3. Be humble.

Happy 3 months, Seth. I love you more than I did on that day and that is so crazy to me. 

Wordless Wednesday: Tarantula

I don't need to say much, the pictures speak for themselves.

All I have to say is: We went hiking during tarantula mating season, and I thought I was going to die. And then we saw one, and I almost peed my pants. My sweet husband let us turn around after that, because Lord knows I'd have a full-blown panic attack after more than one large black tarantula.

NEVER again.

NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER.

Marriage: We Give It Two Thumbs (way) Up

We're back!
And for the first time life isn't crazy and hectic, it's just plain wonderful.

Marriage rocks.
It's hard to explain the complexity of emotions and feelings, but we've been enjoying every minute of it.

We enjoy so much recounting the memories of the wedding. It went by so quickly and we each had different experiences, and every couple hours we say "holy crap, we're married!".

 I love some of the pictures that have been posted too! We are so lucky to live in the time of Instagram and Facebook. To have the tremendous support through these medias has been an incredible blessing to Seth and I.

We can't pick our favorite moment of the whole day, there are just too many. We are overwhelmed and overjoyed and just quite express enough gratitude.

Marriage: We give it two thumbs up.

Also, for those who asked where I got the Disney ears...I ordered them online and Seth had no idea they existed until after the ceremony. It was definitely a top moment of the day surprising him with them :)

xo

1 week

I didn't expect this week to be as much of an emotional roller coaster as it has turned out to be.

I'm exhausted, unable to sleep without bad wedding dreams (todays happened to be waking up on the wedding day with no teeth). 

I'm ready for the planning to be over and for life to begin with Seth, I just want to be married...is that so much to ask?!

I'm ready for the party to start, my friends to be in town, and the errands to be over with.

I'm ready to finally be the bride, to step out of my role as DIY wedding queen and into the pampered life for a few hours.

For months I poured over my wedding pinterest board, longed to finally buy a wedding planning binder, and ripped and snipped my way through wedding magazines...but there's a time for every bride when she just wants it to be over! 

So here I am, 7 days to go and more excited than ever to be Seth's bride. There is so much anticipation and excitement running through me!

That being said, I probably won't be back on the blog for a little while!

Three cheers for one more week!

Hip, hip, hooray!

Because Jesus is Better than the Dreamiest Dream.

Is it really Friday already?

I can't believe how fast time flies these days. 

Today is 28 days..I will marry my best friend in 28 days.

Holy freakin' moly.

Oh my freakin' goodness.

Me oh my.

This journey of engagement has certainly been wild.  All of the stresses I expected, did not come to pass. And all of the things I thought wouldn't cause problems, have caused major problems. 

But God has been SO good through this entire process. God is always good, so maybe I'm just particularly aware of it these days. 

His faithfulness to me, when I honestly would rather have been planning than submitting to Him, blows my mind. 

Things that have been prayed over for 4 years, are coming to fruition, even when I had given up. Our church has surrounded us with love, support, and kindness -- which has been such a gift that we will be forever grateful for. And honestly, I am learning more about marriage, friendship, and His grace than I have learned ever before. 

And Seth and I are unbelievably happy. Isn't that just so mushy and awesome?

I know, this is just the post you wanted to read today..but more than anything, I want to expound on how awesome HE is. 

I am reminded these days especially, that Jesus is so much better than my dream wedding. So much better than the dreamiest wedding I could dream. Better than any perfectly romantic craft, better than the prettiest ceremony.

Better than my marriage, altogether.

While a hurricane of wedding crap blows around my head every day, I am at peace and oddly calm because I know my God is with me. I know the end result...in 28 days I get to be married and that is ALL that matters.  He has taught me to let go of the things that won't matter after the wedding, which is primarily the things that cause the most drama. 

He has taught me to care about the things that will last after the wedding day; primarily my relationship with Christ, which in turn has taught me about what being a wife is all about. 

I am so thankful, so grateful, so overwhelmed with Him yet so at peace in His presence. 

Seth and I's prayer for these last 28 days is simple: May this time glorify HIM. May this marriage be pleasing to HIM. Amen, and amen. 

22: A Birthday Post

5 years ago I was...

Turning 17. 

Thinking about college. 

Just had met Seth.

A senior in High School.

Wanting independence.

A baby.

SO much has happened since then. And I know I will experience the same kind of change in the next 5 years to come. 

Today as I turn 22:

I am . . .

A soon to be wifey.

A church planter.

A crafty shop owner.
A bookworm, wannabe historian, and a collector.

I want . . .

A hot yoga membership.

An endless supply of buttons.

A house on the beach.

Smaller feet.

I have . . .

A man who adores me.

Friends that spoil me.

Family that supports me.

A Savior who died for me.

I hate . . .

Olives

Cheese.

Open water.

Loud noises.
Bugs.
Bra straps that show.
The list goes on..

I wonder . . .

about life in the future. Friendships, church, jobs..

I regret . . .

Harsh words;

that I can't ever take back.

I need . . .

Lots of reassuring.

Frequent date nights.

Patience.

Coffee every morning.
Coke Zero.

I never . . .

want to plan a wedding again. amen.

I am not . . .

Brave.

Adventurous.
Spontaneous.

I rarely . . .

Swear;

I try my hardest not to let emotions cause me to say ugly things.

Wear socks;
they always get in my way!

I always . . .

Feel like I'm not doing enough; 

feelings of inadequacy run deep.
BUT.
I always know the love of Jesus surrounds me,
and that my adequacy cannot be defined by the world.

I wish . . .

The weekends were longer and the working week shorter.

That pre-wedding bliss could last forever.
That gas was free.
That girls weren't dramatic.
That bugs didn't exist. 

I love . . .

Fresh laundry

White tee-shirts

Buttons.

Puzzles.
Winnie the Pooh.

I am...22! 

Scenes From The Weekend

Summer is busy. There is so much happening day to day. Here's a little bit of the last couple weekends.

Haeley and I attempted to go to the beach. And then half way there she remembered she had to be home all day for the Best Buy Geek Squad to come install something. Stupid Geek Squad.

I got to see my long lost friend and Haeley's Graduation party!

This happened. And by this, I'm not entirely sure what this might be. 

Pie also happened. Oh Heidi's, your trashy 24 hour joint never tasted so good. 

Seth took me to the RC car track. Turns out, he's not that crazy about this sport -- the people we met there were even nuttier than I could have imagined. 

We celebrated 4 years on Friday. Woot!

We have been talking about going to the Mystery Spot in Santa Cruz for years. We decided to keep it low key for our anniversary and go there for a couple hours. It was interesting, and nauseating, and perplexing all at the same time. Mostly nauseating though. 

This was as close I could get to the inside of the cabin where all the mystery was. 

Crazyness.

I stood there for 2 seconds before running back to straight ground. 

This is my "take me the heck home" face. 

Or..."take me to get ice cream". And that's exactly what we did. What is a trip to Santa Cruz without Maryanne's ice cream? Banana Almond Fudge and Burgundy Cherry -- we were so full we didn't eat for the next 10 hours. That stuff is crack. 

My favorite part of the Mystery Spot was leaving...and this is my "yay, we are leaving face". 

This little sassy pants is my flower girl. And that is her dress, totally A-traditional..and just her style.  Look out world, Daryn is the sassiest girl in town (I think she takes after me ;) )

Ellen had a birthday. This sweet girl and I share a birthday, but we celebrated her on Saturday night with wine and bruschetta. I could probably eat here every day of the week.

P.S What way do you choose to say bruschetta? I'm convinced they're all correct. 

Seth came over last night to start the new season of Breaking Bad with me. Have you seen that show? Has your world been turned upside down by its craziness?

Well this photo obviously has nothing to do with that show other than the fact that my dog, Autumn, thinks that Seth is her boyfriend and likes to snuggle up next to him whenever he's around. She still pee's when she sees first sight of him coming to the door. Sweet, innocent puppy love...

There's the weekend, ya'll. How was yours? It's another crazy week for me full of last days at work, best friends visiting, my own birthday, two showers, and a BBQ.

Ready, set, goooooo!

P.S Have you heard about Sudan? I love what the Lord is doing through my small little church body. I am excited to see who He calls to go, give, and pray. So spread the word, win some awesome stuff, spread the word some more. That's all you gotta do!

Read more about the giveaway here

4 years.

Today marks 4 years that Seth and I have been dating. 

4 years ago Seth took me up to our favorite spot on Skyline blvd and asked me to be his girlfriend.  It was July, and we knew we only had 2 months until I left for school, in Seattle. And now, here we are, only 2 months from getting married. 

I'd be lying if I told you these past 4 years have been easy and that every day is wonderful. In fact, we have been through more ups and downs than I expected as a 17 year old girl with a cute, new boyfriend. 

What I can tell you, in absolute truth though, is that God designed Seth for me. Designed him to fill in all of the places that I fall short, to be brave where I am not, and to be funny when I am often too serious. There is nothing I have ever been more certain about in my life. 

 In 4 years we have grown together, changed together, lived in different states, and have learned so much about how God designs relationships and marriages.

Even though it's silly to celebrate an anniversary right before we get married, this day will always be special to me. How could it not?!

Seth, I can't wait to marry you. You make me happier than I ever imagined. You make me laugh every day and I know that will always be so. You encourage me to be brave, adventurous, and even a little silly. I am in awe of your humble attitude towards all things, your gracious demeanor, and your willingness to always put others before yourself. I am so thankful for you.

Happy last year of dating. Happy 49 days till our wedding. Happy 4 years, babe!

I love you.

And now...a tour through the years!