Friday, December 7, 2012

3: Reflections on Marriage

Every time I talk to my dear old Dad on the phone he asks the same question:
 How is married life, is it everything you imagined?

My answer is always the same, YES!

Well, I don't yell. But it's always a yes, a good kind of yes, I never hesitate so I wonder why he asks every time still.

It's actually better than what I imagined, so much better. But I'm starting to wonder if our society has tainted marriage to the point that we assume them to fail as soon as they begin?

I hate that mindset so much. Seth and I know instinctively that divorce isn't an option, failure is not an option for us.  If divorce weren't so easy to achieve would that make people more willing to work out their problems? Maybe not so much work on their problems, but submit to the fact that they are prideful and imperfect and that they need help, humility...grace.

And by the way, I love being married. This is the best "choice" I have made in my young life and I have no shame in saying that. 

In these past 3 months of marriage I've learned that marriage has everything to do with grace and nothing to do with me. Marriage has everything to do with Jesus and His bride, the Church -- and how that beautiful relationship reflects on my own relationship with Seth.

I cling to that daily, because every day I fail. Everyday we fail. But every day we point each other to the one who can't fail.

If you can figure that part out, it's easier to navigate the ups and downs. Easier, not necessarily easy. Easier to remain humble, easier to serve, easier to submit (there I said it!), easier to love, easier to respect.

Admittedly, we haven't hit many big bumps yet. We don't have years of life experience under our belt. But we do have our good God who we know placed us together, provides for us, comforts us, and has more grace for us than we could ever provide for each other. So were running with that, were putting our eggs in that basket.

Right now my biggest advice to dating couples:
1.WAIT - and you know what I mean by that. Just...WAIT.
2.READ - read up on some good wisdom about how men communicate and receive love, it makes fights a lot easier when you understand how the other person is feeling.
3. Be humble.

Happy 3 months, Seth. I love you more than I did on that day and that is so crazy to me. 

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